I never get Sundays off. As if it wasn’t enough that Mondays put the ‘blue’ behind ‘Prussian’, the Universe has conspired since the day I got to high school that Mondays would be designed to suck the life out of me. So in school I spent Sunday nights praying I passed the Monday test, during under-graduation I wanted flight tickets to Delhi every Sunday evening to spare me the horror of another week in that hell-hole and post-graduation sees me put my vocabulary to extremely innovative use as I cuss at Monday reviews, AutoCAD and fate come 7p.m. Of course, if I am overworked, then the only reason you would want to speak to me is if your idea of a fun Sunday evening is to have your head bitten off by me.
Also, have I ever spoken of how my mind can come up with extremely judicious ways of squandering away precious time when every second counts? This gone Sunday, at 1 a.m., when I should have been enumerating housing stock and creating pretty pies and splattering them on sheets, I was instead wondering: whatever would happen if there existed a parallel universe where every number had an identity? NumberMommy would tell her kid to study hard; else, he will end up as the housing deficit of Gangtok. Two NumberAunties would spot a neighbor who has recently had surgery done and whisper, ‘Did you hear? She was fudged!’. Eve teasing would occur in the form of NumberRomeo1 telling a friend, ‘Dude, check out the curves on THAT integral!’. A little kid would run home after the races yelling, ‘Mommy! Mommy! I ‘one’ the race!” Moreover, arranged marriages would be a whole lot dicier because, didn’t you hear? He got into Census of India 2011.
The moral of this post? I am a sleep-deprived geek who needs to find something better to do on Sunday evenings.
P.S: Propriety states that I credit Sahil Sasidharan here for physically assaulting me with a thwack on my back with a roar that sounded a little like, ‘Dude! This idea is a gold mine!’ and for causing me to choke more than once on my lunch while putting forth inane suggestions for this post, some of which have, sadly, been incorporated. Thanks, Sahil! 
March 9, 2011
ahundredindecisions
4 responses to “My Mind Wanders Often…”
moby
March 10th, 2011 at 15:11
Yes you’re sleep deprived and about your theory about number names in a parallel universe- its said that when Einstein came out with the theory of relativity , only four people understood then… and he was called a genius…. i call you super genius… :p
I am number 4..from that parallel universe
March 12th, 2011 at 06:34
hmm.. ‘i 1 the race’.kind of makes u think how numbers curse, wat movie genres are flourishing (violent horror replaced by al’gor’ithm?)
wats the census joke?!?!! :@
sakshi gogia
March 14th, 2011 at 15:32
i understood it all… n its really nice!! good idea.. n i can imagine ur frstration….in a much better way than others can do… !! funny! love.
Kunal
April 2nd, 2011 at 09:37
So ..
This is a “I was here” Sign.
Liked your concept of a parallel universe being out there. just dint like the number part of it.. not a big fan of numbers u see… il wage war against them if we contact them ever!!